Friday, March 28, 2014

Moms are Beautiful!

I've been thinking about beauty. It is rather an obscure, indecipherable thing, don't you think? What is beautiful to one person may be only mildly tolerable to another, and vice versa. I was remembering today when I gave myself the screen name of PrettyMama for a website (I don't remember what it even was). Let me tell you, I was feeling nowhere near pretty that day; in fact, I hadn't felt pretty in months. Small Boy was Tiny Baby still at that point, and I was still at the point of amazement with myself that for the first time in my life I couldn't care less if I ever showered again. It had been months since I had worn makeup, did more to my hair than brush it maybe (and possibly less than) once per day, and nursing or pumping every three or so hours certainly wasn't making me feel sexy!
It's funny how very much we change once we are responsible for a tiny helpless little life. All of a sudden I went from wanting to be a pretty wife (yes, I had my hubby bring my makeup bag to the hospital so I would look good in my new mommy photos) to not even caring how horrible my hair was the minute that baby came out. Actually, I think I quit caring sometime during the 36 hours of labor...All of a sudden I was a new person--a mommy--and while it was all I ever wanted to be (other than a wife!) I was totally unprepared for the reality of it. Completely surprised by the continuous complete exhaustion, by the constant needs of that precious little baby, and by my lack of caring about so many details that would have bothered me before giving birth. A woman's whole focus and purspose for life changes at that first birth; and it takes a while to reorient our brains to incorporate that new person into the rest of our being. So hence the name "PrettyMama". It was born of looking in the mirror, realizing that there was a little spot of baby poo on my face, and not caring that it was there, and at the same time thinking that there was something wrong with me for not caring but not knowing what was wrong. What I didn't know was that it was the whole working out of how to merge the new persona of "mommy" with the woman/wife that was still buried in there somewhere. As it turned out, it's like our moms always told us, "Beauty is as beauty does". It didn't matter that I was barely fitting into clothes 4 sizes bigger than I had ever worn, but that I was successfully growing a beautiful healthy boy. I was cooking, cleaning, ironing, washing dishes, and grocery shopping all while juggling that baby--I even got good at making scones with one hand at 10pm! That is what makes a pretty mama, ladies; and yes those details may look a little different for each person, but the principle is the same. It is everything we do, all those sacrifices we make every day for the other people in our homes that make us beautiful. It is the attitude of willingness and desire to do well for those people that make us beautiful. I am not saying that we should always want to do all those things every day, because there are plenty of days that we don't! But it is the love and care we have for our families that makes each of us beautiful. So throw out those societal markers of beauty, because they will always be changing and contradicting and we will drive ourselves nuts trying to meet them.
Yes, it is okay and good to have personal goals for fitness and health; but we need to make sure that those are OUR goals, that they are what is best for us in our personal unique situations. Remember, "but they comparing themselves among themselves are not wise."! (2 Corinthians 10:12)
So I am signing back off for the weekend to work on my beauty--washing dishes, folding laundry, playing with Boy, and spending time with my hubby!

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