Just my thoughts today...(Project 365 Writing/Photography Challenge; Post #17)

It's only a little after noon and it already feels like 10pm. For some odd reason, I did not sleep much last night. And then when my alarm went off this morning, I shut it off instead of getting up and woke up an hour later and realized my awake boy was still in his crib. At this point I felt like a terrible Mom; yes the monitor had fallen off the nightstand and on it's face on the floor, which is why I didn't hear Boy sooner and get up sooner. Now, he is perfectly capable of climbing out of his crib, he just doesn't unless he feels particularly energetic and impish :) I told him this morning that in the future, he should just climb out of his crib and come get me up; I may regret that tomorrow morning, but oh well. Getting up when you are dead tired is just another facet of Mommyhood. So Boy, although he didn't climb out of bed this morning on his own, was definitely impish this morning. On top of that, I went to the grocery store for a quick few things, and forgot a few important things--like ibuprofen and dish soap. Then when I was trying to get Boy to eat his healthy "applesauce" concoction for lunch and he only wanted to eat a bit and then start throwing his Cheerios, I just began to feel confused. All these thoughts were swirling around in my tired foggy brain about "How to get your toddler to eat" and how some people say he is smart enough to learn to just eat whatever I put in front of him if only I would send him to bed without dinner a couple times, and maybe I just don't make food fun enough, and is he getting enough nutrients. Then (he is now in bed for his nap and I am having more coffee!) I opened my computer and began to read. Here about my first priority being that my heart needs to be in the right place with God, and here about Mamas just being the best that we can be for our children, loving and playing with them, instead of worrying about all of today's hotly debated "Mommy" issues.

Life isn't perfect and it never will be, even if you do have the perfect house with the perfect kitchen to cook the perfect food and the perfect budget to be able to afford all the "perfect" foods. We all have to let somethings go, compromise on some things. Because every day will be different, all your little (and big) people in your life will behave/feel a little different each day, and you will only drive yourself insane trying to keep the picture perfect life/home/kitchen/kids you envisioned when you started out on your own in life. I'm serious, you will drive yourself insane; slowly but surely it will happen. Now I don't mean literally insane. I mean the kind of insane where because you keep insisting on those perfect views of life that aren't ever going to happen, because you persist in maintaining that "flowers and butterflies and marshmallow clouds" view of how things should be, you will become increasingly discontent and unhappy. You will lose sight of the important things in life.

The MOST important thing to focus on, is your relationship with God. Seek His will, pray for His wisdom, study His Word, and all those fuzzy things in life, those confusing "should I do this or should I do it that way" things will become clear.
You can only maintain a proper balance, a happy peace in your home when it is centered around God. Put him first, and all the other things will fall into place; you will begin to see what does truly matter, and what you should just let slide. I am reminded of a Sunday School class a few years ago in which Pastor drew a large triangle on the paper and labeled each corner; the top corner being "God" and the bottom corners being "husband" and "wife". Of course that class was dealing with the basis for a proper marital relationship, but that simple illustration holds true for all of life. God should be at the top, He should be the cornerstone that all of our decisions and interactions are based on.

I know that you will all take away something slightly different from this today; but the main thing to remember is, what is the focus of my home? Is it God or is it something else, something that won't matter a hundred years from now? What is the legacy I am leaving for my children and grandchildren? Is it to be "a man after God's own heart" or is it to be someone who lives up to the world's standards for (say in my case, getting my son to eat peas)? :)  Is it being content no matter what because we have Jesus, or is it always striving to keep up with the latest standards in "whole foods eating"? (Nothing against healthy eating, by the way!)

For me, today, I need to refocus on the top of the triangle. To pick up my Bible and read it, every day, and let God be my focus. If my family is fed and clothed and has clean dishes to eat off of, then I should not be discontent that I can't always keep my sink and stovetop shiny. I will do what I can each day, and then when I start to feel overwhelmed, I need to just stop and pray. Refocus. So now I will go read my Bible, then go wash the dishes; because the dog was licking the dirty dishes, which means I really do need to get the pile a little lower. :p



I'm linking up today with